Answers From the Internet

"For help with a variety of common problems, more people turn to the internet than consult experts or family members to provide information and resources."*


*http://www.pewinternet.org/PPF/r/231/report_display.asp

Answers From the Internet

Emotional Abuse

What are examples of Emotional Abuse?
- Being called names by your abuser
- Using words to shame you or put you down in front of others
- Yelling, swearing and screaming
- Using threats to intimidate you
- You abuser may blame you for his or her loss of control
- Your feelings are dismissed (Ex. Refusing to discuss things that are important to you)
- You often wonder why you feel so bad (Ex. You feel depressed and sometimes think that you are crazy)
- Manipulating your actions. The persistence and intense use of threatening words to get you to do something you do not want to do

How do I get help?
It is important to know that it is not your fault and there are people out there who can help you. Check the State and Local Programs page at WomensLaw.org to find organizations new you who provide counseling services.

Emotional Abuse

Less Jobs, More Violence

Data released Jan. 30 by the National Domestic Violence Hotline, shows that there has been an increase in violence over the last year, which could be directly correlated to an increase in job loss.

Over the six months that the NDVH collected data (7,868 callers participated), 54% said there had been a change in their household's financial situation in the last year. Additionaly, 64% said the abuse had gotten worse in the last year.

With past research already supporting the notion that violence increases in times of economic hardship, it is not a surprise that more violence is bring reported today. This means that services like WomensLaw.org, the NDVH, and other organizations across the country are facing a higher demand for services.

Below is a news clip from an Oklahoma news station from Dec. 15, 2008 about the economy increasing abuse in OK.

Less Jobs, More Violence

You're Much More Attractive When You're Not Textually Harrassing Me

The New York Times ran an article today about Teen Dating Abuse, its second in the last month, discussing what is being dubbed "Digital Dating Violence" -- abusive and stalking behaviors, predominately happening between teenagers, that involve social networking sites, text messages and naked pics sent via email and cell phones.

Some of the key problems with teen dating abuse is that teens often don't know what to consider "normal" behavior. Is it okay that their boyfriend sends them text messages every hour? Is it a reasonable request for someone to want naked pictures of you? These are things that the Ad Council and Thatsnotcool.com aim to correct -- helping young people understand what is okay and what is unhealthy.

Abuse behaviors like these in teenagers can be indicators of domestic violence abusers in adulthood.

Thatsnotcool.com is a new website with a new campaign. PSA's in conjunction with the website begin airing on Feb. 9.

You're Much More Attractive When You're Not Textually Harrassing Me

Your Relationship Rights

• The right to good will from the other.
• The right to emotional support.
• The right to be heard by the other and to be responded to with courtesy.
• The right to have your own view, even if your partner has a different view.
• The right to have your feelings and experience acknowledged as real.
• The right to receive a sincere apology for any jokes you may find offensive.
• The right to clear and informative answers to questions that concern what is legitimately your business.
• The right to live free from accusation and blame.
• The right to live free from criticism and judgment.
• The right to have your work and your interests spoken of with respect.
• The right to encouragement.
• The right to live free from emotional and physical threat.
• The right to live free from angry outbursts and rage.
• The right to be called by no name that devalues you.
• The right to be respectfully asked rather than ordered.

Thanks to University of Illinois Counseling Department.

Your Relationship Rights

42 % Increase in Domestic Violence

"The National Crime Victimization Survey, based on projections from a national sample survey, says that at least 248,300 individuals were raped or sexually assaulted in 2007, up from 190,600 in 2005, the last year the survey was conducted. The study surveyed 73,600 individuals in 41,500 households. Among all violent crimes, domestic violence, rape, and sexual assault showed the largest increases. Except for simple assault, which increased by 3 percent, the incidence of every other crime surveyed decreased." - excerpt taken from an article by The Human Rights Watch

42 % Increase in Domestic Violence

Stopping Teen Dating Abuse

A recent article by The New York Times discusses why there is a greater focus on teen dating abuse now then ever before. According to the article, this may be because of an increase in murders of teens by their boyfriends in the last year. Furthermore, cell phones and the internet provide new vehicles for abuse which did not exist in the same way 10, or even 5, years ago.

New approaches to the problem are being adopted by school systems and state legislation which promote awareness of dating abuse behaviors and provide greater legal protection for victims. For example, the Lindsay Ann Burke Act in Rhode Island, which we previously blogged about, requires public schools to teach about dating violence in middle and high schools.

If you are a teen in need of help, or you know someone who is, you can visit WomensLaw.org for legal information about your state which may help you figure out options for your situation.

Stopping Teen Dating Abuse